My Ramble

i feel like in trance,

my mind think all of these are daydream

but i try to believe it's real! (shout)

tell me

yell me

bash me

why i become like this???? :'(

yeah this year is ours! (shoulder slump)

but my point is...

have you ever heard "waver" word???

it means "Become unsteady or unreliable or unsure" (thanks to Google)

yep,it's me (for now)

right now i'm wavering :(

i fallen too deep and became a hardcore (my friend dont like this word so you can replace it with "acute") sone

i ship them

i adore them

i idolize them

and it's two way

as many others call it "reciprocate"

they give me strength

they give me hope

they give me happiness

i feel blissful at that time

But then,

i feel lost from them

i cant find my next step

nor where i should heading

i contact my fellow

asking for accompany

to sharing and caring

but still

i feel lost

i'm beyond ready to do anything

even it need me to fall more deeper

i'm willing to reach the bottom

to the deepest side

so i can brace myself

i miss those time

when i strugle in day

and cherish anything in night

but now everything i'd done is vague

i cant see clearly

they say lighthouse towering and shining

piercing how foggy it is

moreover in the darkness

i am a sone

i am their wish

now i wish for them

to stay together

so i can hang on them

along with every burden i bring

What Lies Behind Us

I saw you that night

Hand entwined

Body collided

Lips crashed

And you moaned

I'm not eavesdropped, definitely not; it's just both of you so loud in this small party

The others giggling and cheering

Then you were dragged out of my sight

And

BANG

A door slammed shut, I peeked inside and I recognize it’s my bedroom

Great MiYoung, last night you told me you want to do it in bathroom but now you do it in my bed?!! You gotta be kidding me!

Second by second

Minutes by minutes

I feel thirsty, I need my beer

I feel lust, I need my MiYoung

Either my thirst or my lust made it worse

With every thud from closed bedroom

I need to vanished from this place

Creak

Now that my damn-bedroom’s door opened and here comes your boyfriend slash b*st*rd

Smirked, headed my direction

He left you fumbled with your shirt and your skirt

How I want to help you so badly

How I want to strip you so badly

“Sorry Taeng, she gave me her first” he whispered in my ear then going outside

“Not my business” I hissed and going to help you

“He told you I give him my first doesn’t he?” you took off your clothes

“Uh huh.” I took a tank top from my closet

“You owe me ten bucks Tae.” You wear it

“And you have to wash my bedcover.” I give you my denim short

“How come? This is my be…….” The short stopped at your thigh while you look around my room

“Mine, you insist to pink-ed my room so you mistake this is as your room.” I pull it up and zipped it

“My one and only mistake is leaving you Tae.” You try kiss me

“You did.” I avoided your lips and took of my bedcover then retrieve it in wash machine

You are really one of a kind Fany-ah, a kind of ecstasy that fall from heaven.

BRAK

“And I regret it.” That’s the last thing you whispered before your lips crashed in mine and my mind crashed, not caring my bruised back.

“Sorry, you are her second dude, I’m her first, she is my first, and we both are the first from all”

i wanna change
they say "change means to have a chance"
so maybe i will change myself
oh,and one thing,i want to try to write fiction
feel free to give me feedback anytime  :)

sumpah man,aku gak kuat liat mukamu..
cantik ; i agree
manis ; i agree
aaa,, ><
you're the best even i was nothing for you

*syairsendu

kali ini aku merasakan bagaimana jeritan orang yang berteriak dan bernyanyi,
berharap mendapatkan pujaan hati.
kali ini ku kan tahu kau tak ada disini,
dan lain hari bersama mentari,
sepi tanpa kau disini.

to opium

swear,i cant face the truth! ><
kamu tahu apa yang aku sesali hari ini? (terutama sore tadi?)
1. aku menyesal membeli pulsa untuk sms kamu
2. aku menyesal sms kamu
3. aku menyesal bertanya "nonton sama sapa?"
4. aku menyesal berniat nggombal
5. aku menyesal mengetahui kamu dengan dirinya

Seorang temanku berkata, “Tak ada gunanya menunggu sesorang yang telah menutup pintu hatinya untuk kita!”
Tetapi aku berkata, “Aku akan selalu menantinya bro!”
Dia membalas, “For what?! She has a boy friend now! You make your way when she got another way!”
“Gosh! I made my own decision and I’m proud of it!” aku berteriak padanya.
“I just don’t want you be mad,and I can’t see you sobbing about her.” Temanku berkata demikian lalu meninggalkanku didalam kelas dengan hati yang semakin gundah.